Merry Christmas Kids
by Lingren
Summary: Jack is laid up in the infirmary over Christmas, but he isn't going to let a little thing like that stop him from completing his mission.


_I just thought I'd share this complete story with you being Christmas and all. I posted it last year, but I guess some of you haven't read it before. It's just a warm fuzzy Christmas fic, full of sap for the holiday. Enjoy!_

Merry Christmas Kids.

by Lingren

Category: Angst, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, Romance, Smarm.

Pairings: Jack/Sam.

Season: 5

Spoilers: Children of the Gods, The Enemy Within.

Summary: Jack is laid up, but he isn't going to let a little thing like that stop him from completing his mission.

Disclaimer: I don't own Stargate SG-1. No copy-write infringements intended. Just borrowing the characters for a little fun, fantasy and imagination.

Author's note: MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

MERRY CHRISTMAS KIDS!

By Lingren.

Daniel Jackson slammed his palm down on the orange crystal hard in his haste to open the wormhole. The matter spewed outwards before it settled into the event horizon.

Sam Carter hastily keyed in their code on the GDO with shaking fingers and hoped that those in the SGC didn't delay in getting the iris open otherwise they would find themselves splattered against the Trinium shield. Once she had managed to get her fingers to respond and punch in the right buttons, she turned and opened fire on the chasing horde and grimaced determinedly as she took out two or three of the natives.

Teal'c, heavily burdened with the unconscious form of their leader sprawled limply across his shoulders, struggled up the steps and dived straight into the open Stargate, quickly followed by Daniel and Sam.

A clattering of feet heralded their arrival on Earth.

"Close the iris!" yelled Sam and Daniel together, watching the event horizon for any natives that might have followed them in. The defence shield spiralled into place and there was several thuds against it before the wormhole cut off, leaving the room silent for a few seconds.

Teal'c lowered the Colonel to the metal ramp, and knelt beside him to check he was still with them. The others gathered round the inert and bloody form lying at their feet.

"Major, report!" General Hammond demanded, looking worried at the stillness of his second in command.

Sam tore her eyes away from Colonel O'Neill and began to tell the General what had happened on the planet.

"We're not sure exactly what happened sir. One minute the natives appeared friendly, the next they attacked, taking out the Colonel. Teal'c grabbed him and we made a break for the gate. They chased us but Daniel and I were able to keep them at bay for long enough so we could gate home."

Janet Frasier moved in as soon as she and her team stepped into the gate-room and they lifted O'Neill's slack body onto the gurney and rushed him away to the infirmary.

The rest of his team as well as the General watched him being wheeled away, each wrapped up in their own thoughts.

Daniel wrapped his arms around himself in a self-hug, wondering if Jack was going to pull through this time, he looked almost as if he was already dead.

Sam wondered if she would ever be able to act on her feelings now, or if it was indeed too late to go forward with him, fully admitting her inner most thoughts.

Teal'c, ever stoic, ever stolid, began to think that his brother in arms might yet pull through this; he was ever positive.

General Hammond fretted about the possibility of losing Jack whom he considered almost a son; albeit an irascible and irreverent one at times. Jack O'Neill was a good man as well as an outstanding officer, but why he always seemed to be the one who was picked on by the enemy was always a mystery, perhaps because he was the leader of the team.

General Hammond turned back to the Major, and addressed the team.

"Go get yourselves cleaned up people and report to the briefing room in two hours. Dismissed!"

"Yes sir!" Sam replied, offering a smart salute. She looked at Teal'c whose shoulders were covered in the Colonel's blood.

"Come on Teal'c. You need to clean up, even if we don't. Janet has her hands full right now and we'll just get in the way for a while."

Teal'c bowed regally and followed her to the elevator along with a miserable Daniel.

OoOoOoOoO

"Any news from Janet?" Daniel asked as they joined Sam waiting silently outside the infirmary, after he and Teal'c had showered.

"Not yet, no. She's been in there for hours, surely she must have sorted him out by now," Sam sighed fretfully.

"Sam, we've only been back for what? 45 minutes..." Daniel chided.

"Well it seems like hours," she retorted quickly.

Just then a nurse came out to tell them that Janet was in surgery still and that all was going well so far.

The three team-mates breathed a collective sigh of relief, and prepared themselves for a longer wait.

It was another hour before the doors opened again and Janet appeared. Daniel and Sam who had been sitting on the hard plastic chairs stood when she emerged from the room.

"Janet," they both chorused.

Janet let out a weary sigh and pulled the surgical mask from her face.

"Well, he's stable for now, but he's lost a lot of blood. I'm giving him a transfusion so that should compensate. The wound was deep and ugly but luckily it missed anything really vital."

"Can we see him?" Daniel asked; his puppy dog eyes pleading with her. Janet looked at Sam and saw an echoing need there too.

"Just for a while, yes, but I want you to rest. He'll be out for hours yet. Go get something to eat and have a sleep then you can come back."

"We have a de-briefing before we can rest. We're not leaving him on his own Janet!" Sam stated determinedly, undeterred by Janet's scowl.

"We'll go get something to eat after the briefing and then I'll come back while Sam takes a rest, then I promise I'll rest while Sam watches over him," Daniel explained, hoping Janet would agree.

Janet held up her hands tiredly, but with a wry grin on her face. She knew she would never be able to refuse them. They were the tightest knit team in the mountain. Nothing would part them for long. When the Colonel was stranded for three months on Edora, Sam had gone to extraordinary lengths to get him back, inventing a machine for the sole purpose of breaking through the solid surface to reach him. There was no way she was going to dissuade them.

"Okay, but either way you do this; one of you will take a rest first!"

"We will Janet. Promise!"

"I do not require rest Dr. Frasier," Teal'c stated solemnly.

"I know that Teal'c but you still need to eat."

He acknowledged her words of wisdom with a regal nod of his head.

"Teal'c and I will go get some food after the de-briefing. Daniel, we'll bring along some coffee and a snack for you while you stay with the Colonel."

"Great. Thanks Sam."

Sam, Daniel and Teal'c hurried away to the de-briefing, relieved to know that their CO was going to be okay.

Janet re-entered the infirmary and studied the read-outs as they monitored Jack's vital signs. Janet was happy with the results and left a nurse to keep vigil over her charge.

OoOoOoOoO

It was coming up for Christmas in a few days and everyone was in festive mood except Jack. He was recovering well, but Janet had informed him that he wasn't going anywhere to celebrate this year; due to the severity of his injury, he was staying put in her infirmary, even if she had to handcuff him to the bed! He grumbled and moaned, saying he had a significant prior engagement to attend on Christmas Day, but wouldn't elaborate further when questioned why it was so important that he should be there.

"If you'll just tell me what it's about, I can ring up for you to cancel it. I'll explain that you were injured and that you're very sorry you can't make it Jack," Daniel sighed patiently. "I'm sure they'll understand Jack!"

Jack looked up at him from his bed and closed his eyes, Daniel had obviously forgotten about last month's fiasco. Well he hadn't!

"I'm not saying Daniel. It's a private matter."

"Look, I don't want to pry, but if only you would let me explain everything to whoever it is, then I'm sure they'll..."

"No!" barked Jack weakly, growing impatient with Daniel's constant pleading.

"If it's that important, then surely..."

"Daniel!" he warned as loudly as he could given his position and condition, "What part of 'NO' don't you understand?"

"The part I don't understand is your refusal to allow me to contact whoever it is that is expecting you!" Daniel grumbled.

"Just...forget it!"

"Jack?"

"Daniel!"

"But...?"

"It doesn't matter!"

"You just said it was important, Jack. How can that not matter?"

"Oh fer cryin' out loud!" Jack sighed, wincing in pain as he squirmed and tried to turn away from Daniel's insistence.

Daniel noticed his friend's discomfort and decided that if Jack really didn't want him to inform them of his predicament then who was he to argue? They would probably be put out because Jack had failed to cancel his engagement; would more than likely refuse to trust him again, but as he didn't know anything, and Jack wouldn't tell him, he couldn't help him out either.

Daniel's thoughts were interrupted by the appearance of Sam who had brought some more reading material for her CO to peruse, so the subject was dropped. For now anyway, Daniel was determined to discover if Jack had secreted a girl somewhere and didn't want the team to know about her. Major Connelly said he had seen Jack with a woman a couple of weeks ago before the mission; they were having coffee in a café on Nevada. It was all a mystery which intrigued him no end.

"Hi, how are you feeling sir?" Sam asked cheerfully, completely unaware of the tension in the room.

"Peachy, Carter. Just peachy!" he grumbled, because Daniel had put him in a bad mood, and he really did hurt too. "I hurt!" he pouted.

"Yes sir, of course you do!" she replied brightly.

Jack grumbled again softly but neither of his team-mates could make out the words, but well understood the manner in which he uttered them.

"Sir?" Sam asked wondering why he was in such a bad mood. He wasn't normally this bad, at least not towards her. Something must have upset him.

"Jack says he has an important 'engagement' to attend on Christmas Day, but he won't tell me what it is. I would have phoned them to apologise on his behalf, but he won't let me."

"Why not?" she turned her puzzled gaze onto her CO. "Sir?"

"You tell me!" Daniel sighed and shrugged, when Jack ignored her question.

"Colonel. I could..."

"No!"

"See!" Daniel retorted, waving a hand in Jack's direction out of frustration.

Sam sighed too, studying the scowl on the face of the Colonel as he glared up at Daniel.

"Okay..." she began slowly, drawing the sound out. "Why not sir?"

"It's personal Carter!"

"We're just trying to help sir!"

Jack winced in pain again, pushing his head forcibly into the pillow under his head, trying to escape the nagging ache that was worsening by the minute, as well as their questions. The beep from the monitor quickened and Janet was there in a flash.

"Colonel?"

He just lay there unwilling and unable to explain how bad he was feeling right then. He wasn't sure which hurt the most. The insistent nagging from his team-mates; the pain of from letting those people that were relying on him, down. He wanted things to remain as they were, nice and comfortably incognito, his own participation undisclosed; or the very real pain in his chest which seemed to be robbing him of his breath.

He coughed helplessly, grunting in agony when it hurt like crazy and Janet sent his two team members out into the corridor to wait as she pulled the privacy curtain and tried to fathom out why his heart-rate had risen and his blood-pressure was dropping.

OoOoOoOoO

"So what are you saying Doctor?" General Hammond asked, his steadily controlled voice masking his worry.

Everyone in the briefing room turned their eyes on Janet, waiting for her to tell them what was happening to Colonel O'Neill.

"It seems he got a little worked up over something..." she started, staring hard at Daniel, who at least had the grace to look down at the table guilty, "...and unfortunately it pulled the stitches loose, so he was bleeding internally again. We had to take him back into surgery and close the wound once more."

"What did he get worked up about? Anyone know? Doctor Jackson you were with him weren't you? Did he seem upset?"

Daniel gulped and fiddled with his pen, not knowing where to start.

"He...ah...he was a little...em...short tempered when I wanted..."

"He said he had an important errand to run on Christmas Day but wouldn't allow either Daniel or myself to telephone them to let them know he couldn't make it, sir," Sam explained, easing the censure from Daniel's shoulders. "He became agitated when all we wanted to do was help him out."

General Hammond looked back at Janet for her contribution again.

"It is possible he was uncomfortable to start with sir, and it worsened when he perhaps felt pressured," Janet speculated.

"I see!" Hammond sighed. "But he'll be okay?"

"Yes sir, given time. I'm keeping him on bed rest for at least the rest of the week sir, and only then will I consider allowing him to get up for short periods. The damage was extensive."

"Okay; SG-1 consider yourselves on ten days downtime. Have a good Christmas people. I don't expect to see any of you under inside this mountain until the New Year. Dismissed!"

"Thank you sir, and a Merry Christmas to you too General," they chorused.

Janet walked back to the elevator to get back to her infirmary, and the others escorted her to the doors.

"He will be okay, won't he Janet?" Sam asked, worriedly.

"He'll be fine. By the time you all get back, I will be more than ready to sling him out of the door, so that you three can take over his convalescence."

"Do you think he's got a rendezvous with a woman, that he doesn't want us to know about?" Daniel asked, bringing them all to a halt with shock. He didn't notice Sam bite her lip, and turn a little pale at his words. "Well, why else won't he tell us what he's got planned. It stands to reason if you think about it! It's not like he's got to ask us permission to date anyone and he's no longer married to Sara. And Major Connelly did see him chatting over coffee with a woman a while ago. "

Janet moved her hand subtly onto Sam's elbow, bringing with it a little reassurance that she understood how Sam must be feeling. She knew Sam's secret infatuation with her CO, but obviously Daniel wasn't party to it. There was supposed to be an unspoken understanding between her and the Colonel. Janet was peeved that he would do that to Sam just because he couldn't wait for the appropriate time, whenever that could be, when they could be together.

Sam smiled back at her closest friend weakly, closing her eyes against the thought of Jack seeing someone else, and sighed with frustration as the elevator doors opened.

Sam meant to accompany Janet up to the infirmary level so that they could talk in private, but Daniel and Teal'c joined them, wishing to say cheerio to Jack before they started their downtime, so her confidential conversation would have to wait for a bit.

Daniel was thinking of taking some work home with him, and try to do some long overdue decorating to his apartment. Teal'c had toyed with the idea that he might go off-world to join his son and Master Bra'tak for the week, but Sam invited them round to her house for Christmas Dinner first.

Janet plucked up courage and asked outright.

"Do you really think the Colonel is having a secret liaison with a woman Daniel?"

"Why not?" he replied shrugging.

"So why didn't he want to admit it?"

"I don't know," Daniel shrugged again. "Teal'c?"

"I know nothing concerning O'Neill's private life. If he wished us to know of a romantic attachment that he had formed, then he would have informed us of it," Teal'c said archly, his eyes holding Sam's own, and sharing a sympathetic look with her.

"So you're saying it's none of our business?" Daniel sighed with disappointment.

"Indeed!"

"Aren't you in the least a little bit curious?"

"I am not!" Teal'c answered haughtily.

Sam was saved further discussion by the elevator reaching the floor where the infirmary was situated.

They filed out of the car and headed towards the room where Jack was now ensconced. Daniel and Teal'c opened the door and entered, with Daniel holding the door wide for Sam to follow.

"Sam? You coming in to say good-bye to Jack?"

"Em...Not now Daniel. I...er...I need to talk to Janet," she explained, but the feeble excuse sounded weak even to her own ears.

The truth was she didn't know if she could ever look at Jack again without feeling a little disenchanted with him. If what Daniel had said was true, where did that leave her? She couldn't bring herself to face him, not right now anyway; it was hurting too much. She was sure that as soon as Janet closed the office door, that she would break down and cry. How could he do that to her?

Jack had heard Sam decline the opportunity to see him and he couldn't think why she would want to do that. Maybe, he pondered, looking forward with anticipation, that she would drop by when the others had left. He clung on to the hope while he suffered Daniel's cheerful but inane chatter.

Jack was feeling better now that Janet had sorted his problem out, and after Daniel and Teal'c had been gone for over 30 minutes, he looked up expectantly when the door opened but it was only to admit Janet to check on his progress.

He couldn't help but feel a twinge of disappointment when Sam hadn't entered instead.

"Colonel...how are you feeling?"

"I'm fine Doc! When can I get out of here?"

"Not until after Christmas Colonel!"

"Doc!"

"Nothing doing sir. You almost died, again! There's no way I'm ready to sign you out of here; not yet anyway!"

"Daniel and Teal'c have already left for the holiday. Carter's gone off too I guess?" he asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

"Yes sir. She went home about 15 minutes ago. Why?...did you need to see her?" Janet asked probing for clues.

"Ah...no, no, not really," he shrugged, but ended up hurting himself in the process.

"Sir?" Janet asked when she saw his face scrunch up in pain.

"I'm fine, just a little sore still."

"That's to be expected sir. There was a lot of deep muscle damage, but you were lucky; it could have been worse. Would you like any pain medication?"

He shook his head, no way did he want any more drugs in his system if he could help it.

"You mean there's worse than this?" he quipped, feigning surprise.

Janet knew the Colonel by now and ignored his usual sarcasm.

"If you need Sam, I could ring the surface and they could..."

"Nah! Don't bother Doc. Let her go get some rest," he sighed, trying hard to hide his concern at her seeming rebuff, by not coming to say good-bye or wishing him well before she left. Normally she wouldn't have hesitated, but she had, and he was anxious to know why.

He did what he always did where Sam was concerned. He worried more than he should have. He brooded on her absence, undecided as to whether it had been something he'd said, which he couldn't recall now, or something or rather that 'someone' else had taken precedence over him and she no longer regarded him in the same light. It kept him awake and restless that night and the following day too.

OoOoOoOoO

Christmas Day dawned bright and clear and the atmosphere throughout the halls of the SGC was cheerful, except in the infirmary where Jack was being obstinate and insisting he was fine and that he wanted to go home before he went crazy.

Janet was having the day off and Dr. Warner was standing in for her.

Dr. Warner, Jack found, much to his disgust, was as hard as Janet to shift from his opinion. Jack would be staying where he was.

The cajoled him, they threatened him, and he scowled at them before he agreed to rest before his special 'light' Christmas meal arrived. He settled down and they left him to rest.

The klaxons wailed loudly, and the speaker on the wall in the corridor announced "Off-world activation. Unscheduled incoming wormhole!"

Minutes later Jack heard a lot of activity going on out in the hallway and guessed that there were wounded men to deal with; obviously something had gone wrong with one of the missions. Now was his chance.

He pulled back the bed-clothes and lowered his feet to the floor, wincing slightly. He held onto the edge of the bed as he walked unsteadily towards the door, hoping that the staff would be too busy to notice his escape until he was driving off in his truck.

There wasn't any sign of the nurses, so he made it to the elevator safely, which then took him to the level with the locker room. So far he hadn't been spotted because there was only minimal personnel on duty as it was Christmas Day.

It was only a matter of 30 minutes later that he was driving slowly and carefully out of the complex and down the mountain. Sweat beaded on his brow as he tried to ignore the ever present ache in his side, and he refused to admit to himself that it hurt like hell, and that this 'mission' was a huge, honkin' big mistake.

OoOoOoOoO

When the emergency was over, and one of the nurses was free to check on the Colonel, she rushed back to Dr. Warner and informed him that the officer was missing.

A hue and cry went up and the security forces searched the whole complex for the missing patient.

"He's just not here sir," one of the SF's stated. They had drawn a blank; nobody had seen Colonel O'Neill.

Dr. Warner frowned and swore; the man was impossible! How could he, badly injured as he was, just get up out of his bed and disappear?

Another SF got off the phone and turned towards the Doctor.

"Dr. Warner, sir, it seems that Colonel O'Neill checked out of the SGC just over an hour ago."

"What?" he gasped. "How?" He doubted he could even walk properly, let alone get that far. He needed to see General Hammond. Now!

He knocked on the General's door.

Hammond was in a good mood, though saddened because being on duty meant he was having to forgo Christmas with his daughter and his two granddaughters.

"Come!" he called, wondering who it could be.

Dr. Warner opened the door and entered.

Hammond immediately noticed his face was lined with anxiety.

"Doctor? What can I do for you?"

"Sir, Colonel O'Neill has left his bed in the infirmary, despite Dr. Frasier's and my warnings, and has left the SGC. Apparently he signed out over an hour ago. I really need someone to go check on him and bring him back General, he's really too sick to be at home on his own."

Hammond smiled wryly, despite the seriousness of the situation. Jack was incorrigible; he hated being laid up in the infirmary. He schooled his expression to one of concern when the Doctor drew himself up ready to argue his case.

The General held up a hand to forestall him.

"Is his life in any jeopardy?"

"Possibly yes sir, he's still a sick man. Dr. Frasier was most insistent that he wasn't to get up and move about yet because his wound was still too recent for such activity. He could undo all her work by pulling open the stitches again."

"I see; so you think I should send someone to his house to escort him back here?"

"Yes sir, I most certainly do."

"Very well Doctor. I'll send some SF's round there. I also suggest that you arrange for one of your nurses to join them; just in case!"

"Yes sir, I'll go and make the arrangements now. With your permission sir?"

"Certainly Doctor. Have the medic meet them on the surface."

"Yes sir," Warner replied, already thinking about who he should send to fetch the errant Colonel. It would have to be someone that wasn't easily deterred by the Colonel's cavalier attitude.

OoOoOoOoO

Sam answered the insistent ringing of her phone.

"Sam Carter," she answered brightly.

"Sam?"

"Daniel? What's wrong?" she asked sensing his anxiety.

"It's Jack! He's disappeared from the infirmary."

"What? I thought Janet said he shouldn't be up and about just yet?"

"Janet did, except he's gone AWOL, and she's livid."

"Why didn't he say anything? Has anyone been round to his house yet? Do you want me to go?"

"No, it's okay, I'm just on my way round there now Sam. He was so insistent about getting to this 'date' he had sometime today, I reckon that's where he's gone, the stupid idiot."

"Yes, but where is that exactly?"

"I wish I knew Sam. He wouldn't tell me," Daniel sighed, perhaps Jack didn't trust him anymore. Jack had been really touchy about that subject, refusing to tell anyone where he was meant to be today.

"You want me to go out looking? He could be anywhere Daniel!"

"No, no. He may call round to see you Sam, Janet said he was asking after you the other day, but you'd already gone home, and he said not to bother you."

Sam could understand that to a certain degree. Especially if he wanted to tell her that he was dating someone else. She didn't want to hear it, that's why she hadn't bothered to go and see him.

"Okay. You will be joining me later with Teal'c, won't you? It is Christmas Day Daniel. I have all your presents here."

Yeah, we'll be round after we've found Jack. When we find him, I can see Janet's not going to release him for a long time. I can't understand why is was so important? What the hell was he thinking of?"

"Who knows, Daniel? But it obviously meant a lot to him," she replied feeling the tell tale sting of tears behind her eyes. She willed them away; there was no way she could tell Daniel why she was upset. "Let me know when you find him, if you get to him first."

"Okay Sam; oh, and Merry Christmas!" Daniel cheered, though his mind wasn't really on the holiday, he was concerned for his friend's welfare and his sanity.

OoOoOoOoO

Hours later Jack stood on the porch and rang the doorbell. His knees felt weak and his legs were shaking, threatening to dump him on the deck; he felt decidedly awful. He reckoned he must have looked awful too, because when Sam Carter opened the door, she gasped when she saw him standing there, pale yet flushed and barely able to stand upright. He was leaning heavily on the doorpost for support, and for a very brief moment she mistakenly thought he was drunk, until she recalled that he was supposed to be sick and he really did look ill.

"Colonel! Should you be out of the infirmary sir?" she scolded lightly, knowing darn well that everyone was out looking for him. Boy was Janet going to have a piece of his hide for being AWOL from her infirmary.

"No!" he replied firmly and succinctly. "Can I come in? 'Cos if I don't sit down soon, I'm gonna fall down right here!"

"Sorry sir, come in!" Sam reacted quickly when she realised that he was on his last legs, literally, and stepped back hastily to allow him to enter the house. Why was he here? Why didn't he just go back to the infirmary?

He staggered into the hallway with difficulty, wavering with every step, clutching onto the hall table as he went. It wasn't until he'd stood under the dim hall light that she realised there was blood soaking the front of his shirt and pants. By the time she had all but slammed the door shut rapidly behind him, he was already falling to his knees.

"Too late," he quipped, trying to grin but failing, turning it into more of a grimace. He wrapped one arm around himself as if to hold in the pain and the blood, but he was fading fast. He reached out to steady himself against the wall.

Sam reached out hastily and supported his weak frame, but he was too big and heavy for her, and he keeled over anyway, ending up in a crumpled, gasping heap, leaking blood all over her beige carpet. She pushed him over gently onto his back and he couldn't help groaning in pain, trying to roll back over and curl up into a foetal position again. She pulled his head and shoulders into her arms, supporting them with her thighs while trying to assess the root of the problem, resisting the urge to stroke the silvery strands of hair back from his sweat beaded brow when she remembered he was supposed to be seeing someone else.

His eyes were glassy and the long-lashed lids were half mast but his hazy gaze was still fixed on her.

"I...I couldn't...disappoint her. Sorry," he gasped as her overly bright blue eyes full of unshed tears met with his, then those amazing brown orbs rolled back under the fluttering lids as he lost the battle to stay conscious.

Disappoint who? Sorry? Sorry for what? Sorry for dating someone else? Sorry for collapsing in her hallway and bleeding over her carpet? What? Sorry for escaping the infirmary too soon? What was he sorry about? Sam just didn't know what to make of his words.

"Colonel? Sir!" she cried, but he was oblivious to her demands. "Oh God Jack!" she whimpered, touching his face tenderly and for the first time noticed the heat radiating from him.

She lowered his head gently to the floor and picked up her cell phone from the hall table before dialling the SGC, asking to be put in touch with Janet. It picked up almost instantly.

"Janet? It's me, Sam. Look Colonel O'Neill just showed up here and he's collapsed in my hallway," she rushed, trying not to waste time. Time he didn't have much of by the look of him.

"Okay! We'll be right over. Where the hell has he been anyway?" she asked while dragging her coat from the hanger on the coat stand, and slipping it on over her white medic's coat.

"I have no idea Janet. He stepped into my hall and apologised just before collapsing. He never said anything much except that 'he couldn't disappoint her,' whatever that meant, and that he was 'sorry'. I don't know what he meant by that Janet, I really don't," You'd better hurry, he's bleeding quite heavily and it looks like he has a fever too," she informed her nervously, wondering how long it would be before her friend arrived.

"I'm on my way Sam, try and stop the bleeding if you can, and get something to cool him down, a cool damp cloth, anything. I'll get to you as soon as I'm able!"

Sam replaced the phone and hurried away to the kitchen to dampen a clean cloth, and grab a clean towel to press against the re-opened wound.

She hurried back to Jack's side and knelt down beside him, wondering what he had been doing for the last three or four hours.

OoOoOoOoO

What seemed like far too long, but was only a matter of 20 minutes later, Sam heard a couple of cars pull up outside and hurried to open the door. Daniel rushed inside and stopped in the doorway when he took in his friend's ashen appearance as he lay on the floor. Janet pushed him out of the way and knelt down by Jack's side, pulling aside his clothes to get a good look at the wound.

Janet cursed the man lying on the floor as she worked, but all the time she was making notes of what she needed to do to save the infuriating officer this time round.

She stabilized him with an IV and hooked him up to a fresh supply of blood before ordering him to be taken into the ambulance and delivered to the SGC's infirmary.

Sam didn't know what to do for the best. Obviously he had wanted to talk to her, and part of her wanted to know and part of her didn't want to know what he was going to say. She watched as the ambulance sped away with Janet in the back taking care of Jack. Daniel stood beside her, his arms crossed over and wrapped around his chest in what Sam recognised as his comfort hug. She laid a hand on his arm and drew him back into the house.

"Daniel?"

"Hmmm?"

"Daniel!"

"Oh...um...Sam. What?"

"Never mind," she sighed, turning to her other team-mate. "Teal'c?"

"Major Carter?"

"Do you think you could move the Colonel's truck? It's blocking my driveway and I need to get my car out!"

"Indeed," he rumbled taking the keys from the hallway table. Jack had dropped them when he collapsed and she'd picked them up and left them on the hall table.

Teal'c moved past her and headed out the door and Sam made a coffee for Daniel, who was in shock. He needed a coffee to bring him round again. Janet didn't want any of them under her feet and ordered then to eat their Christmas dinner before it got ruined and that afterwards they could come and see how the Colonel was.

Daniel had argued at first, he wanted to go in the ambulance with Jack, but Janet was insistent; she had to deal with this crisis first, and when he recovered, she was going to kill him.

While Daniel sipped at his coffee absently, Sam set to and cleaned the hall carpet as best she could.

Moments later Teal'c came in looking puzzled.

"What is it Teal'c?" Sam asked frowning at the Jaffa's expression.

"I found this on the floor of O'Neill's truck," he stated, still mystified.

He held up a plastic bag with something that showed red in it, and the odour from it made her swallow quickly. It smelled of blood. Jack's blood.

"What's in there Teal'c? Maybe I should wash it for the Colonel..." she started, needing to do something about the smell before she lost her stomach contents embarrassingly.

"What the...?" Daniel gasped, peering into the bag. He stood there like he was rooted to the spot.

"Daniel?" she frowned, and then he was pulling the contents of the bag out.

All three team-mates gaped with astonishment at the garments that Daniel was now holding up. The blood-stain clearly visible, despite the red background.

"Oh my god!" Sam gulped.

"Damn him!" Daniel swore. "I remember now. Jack said, ages ago, maybe last month, that he'd been asked by the local orphanage to play Santa on Christmas morning. I though it was a joke. I laughed and teased him about it. After that he never said another word. I completely forgot about it. Oh God! No wonder he wouldn't tell us anything...he was...he probably thought we'd all laugh at him for playing Santa Claus to a bunch of kids. How could I have been so stupid?"

Daniel dropped the suit back into the bag, but Sam rushed over and dug it out again.

"It will have to be cleaned anyway Daniel. Do you remember which orphanage he was going to?"

"No. He...um...never got that far. After I laughed, he...sort of clammed up."

"Now there's a surprise!" she retorted dryly. Jack didn't like people taking the piss out of him especially if he was deadly serious. Of course he would have kept the whole thing quiet after that.

Sam delved into the pockets of the suit and came upon a slip of paper with an address on it.

"Ah ha! Got it!" she cried, dumping the stained suit back into the bag and then dropping it into the laundry basket. "Come on you two. We have something to do!" she ordered briskly.

"What? Sam?" Daniel called after her as she disappeared down the hallway towards the door.

She stopped at the faint stain left behind on the carpet that reminded her of Jack's self-sacrifice, just to please those poor kids on Christmas Day. It brought home to her just what sort of man Jack O'Neill was. Loyal; Painfully honest; and a man in a million. He hadn't dated anyone else, he still loved her, didn't he? It had been to her that he had come, and now she was going to do something for him, because she felt she needed to make it up to him for her suspicious nature and her doubt of his commitment towards her.

She sucked in a huge breath and blew it out forcibly in relief; she was happier now than she had been for the last week. Now she understood.

OoOoOoOoO

Daniel knocked on the door of the large building. It was more than a vast rambling house, it was home to a lot of children by the look of things.

A small pleasant faced woman in her mid forties opened the door, her face flushed with warmth and cheerfulness.

"Yes? Can I help you?" she asked.

"We're..." Daniel faltered for a moment, suddenly unsure what to say.

"We were wondering if the children enjoyed Santa's visit?" Sam asked for him.

"You must be friend's of Jack's then?" she asked after closing the door behind them.

Daniel nodded.

"Ah...yeah." He was wondering if this was such a good idea after all, Jack might be furious with them if he found out.

"Come in, come on in then. Any friend of Jack's is welcome. I'm Sandy, by the way," she said introducing herself. "Sandy Kawalski. I run the home here."

The name stunned Daniel for a moment, wondering if she was related to Jack's dead friend.

"Hi, I'm Sam, this is Daniel and...this is Murray."

"Kawalski?" Daniel puzzled, "As in Charlie Kawalski?"

Sam looked at him askance, and then recalled the Colonel's late friend.

"Yes, that's right. Charlie was my brother. He was in the Air Force along with Jack. They'd been friends for a long time before he died. Did you know him? Jack's been so good to us. He always pops in to see the children whenever he can. They adore him of course, but then who wouldn't? Jack's wonderful with kids, it's such a shame that he lost his dear Charlie, he was a darling child, but so like Jack, full of mischief."

Sam listened agog to Sandy as she rambled. She felt she was learning a lot about the Colonel outside of work.

"Yes, we knew Charlie...em...your brother, that is, but not for very long." Daniel swallowed the lump obstructing his throat when he recalled Kawalski's and Ferretti's attitude towards him during that mission before he got them home safe from Abydos after killing Ra. The second time they met showed a great improvement in their relationship. "He was a good man," he added as an afterthought. He felt he had to say something to please her.

Sandy positively beamed at him, and then invited them to follow her.

"Jack was so good with them all today. The children all loved him as Santa, and he lifted every single one of the younger ones onto his knee while they chatted," she prattled as they walked towards the vast family room.

Sam noticed that it overlooked an enormous garden full of snow covered play equipment and had a huge snowman which adorned the lawn area.

Every one of them? Jack had lifted almost all of these kids? Daniel pondered. No wonder Jack was bleeding again! The mad fool! He wished he could turn back the clock and not reacted the way he had, then none of this would be necessary.

There was a tall Christmas tree, all richly decorated, sitting in one corner of the room, and a TV, VCR and a DVD player on a purpose built unit in another. There were plenty of sofas and chairs dotted around and toys lay scattered over the floor with a dozen or so children playing happily. They were between the ages of about 4 to 10, and who had all stopped their games to see who it was visiting them.

"Children, these people are Santa's friends," she stated, making the trio feel guilty as if they were spies, prying into Jack's personal affairs.

"Shouldn't they be shorter, have pointy ears and beards?" one of the older boys quipped, making the team-mates splutter with laughter. It sounded as if he had spent a lot of time around Jack O'Neill!

Sandy smiled indulgently, waiting for the expected greeting from her charges.

There was a chorus of 'Hello's and 'Hi's before they resumed their games. Some of them came over to them and smiled. One small girl, came up and took Sam's hand and shyly pulled her into the room to show her what Santa had brought her.

"Oh wow," Sam said as the child held the new doll up for inspection.

"Santa Jack gived it me!" she stated painfully slowly.

Sam melted under the simple trust the child had shown her, because she was so happy that Santa Jack had come and given her a new doll to play with.

Sandy explained that Eloise who was 5, had lost her previous doll in the car accident that had killed her parents, and after that she moved from one relative to the next, none of whom wanted the girl, or could cope with her reluctance to join in or speak. And none of them would buy her a new doll to replace the broken one. Now she was here with them and happy at last. She hadn't spoken to anyone since the accident until Santa Jack had given her the doll, and even as Sandy told the tale she couldn't hold back a tear or two.

Daniel felt his own tears prickle behind his eyes and berated himself for feeling like a sap. But that was Jack for you; he had limited patience out in the field especially with him, when things were important; but here, he had shown how patient, kind and generous he was where these unfortunate kids were concerned. It made Daniel feel Jack's pain at losing his Charlie that much more poignant.

'No'...he thought, these kids aren't unfortunate, they had Jack in their lives, so they were more fortunate than he had been as a child. Jack was someone whom he would have loved to have known when he was growing up in a similar place. His orphanage was stark and run like an army camp with no love whatsoever; here though, the kids had plenty of that, and they knew Jack and they obviously thought a lot of him. Lucky them!

He blinked furiously, trying hard to rid his eyes of the embarrassing moisture.

"Is everything alright with Jack? He didn't look at all well you know. I told him that I would get someone else to play Santa, but he insisted," Sandy rattled on. "He seemed to be in a bit of pain, but he denied it of course."

"Not really. Em...Jack was sick, yes. He was supposed to be in the infirmary but he wouldn't stay put. He'd been wounded last week but he's going to be okay," Daniel answered with a smile, hoping to allay Sandy's fears as well as his own.

"He shouldn't really have left his bed, but he told me he couldn't disappoint them," Sam added, waving a hand at the children.

"Well, you tell him from me, it was very naughty of him, but his cheerful goodwill was very welcome, and is always appreciated. Won't you thank him for me? I didn't get much chance to say anything earlier; he seemed to be in a bit of a rush to get home, which, if he was feeling ill, then I can understand his reason for leaving quickly."

"Um...thank you for allowing us to share in all this Sandy. Unfortunately we have to go now; lots of places to go, people to see, making the rounds if you know what I mean. You know how it is at Christmas! Hope the children have a super holiday. Bye!" Daniel said, fumbling for an excuse to leave. He had a mission now, and just hoped that Jack would forgive him for making fun of him before he realised the importance all this meant to Jack; and also for what he was about to do.

Sam was a little puzzled by Daniel's hurry to leave, but smiled good-bye anyway. Teal'c followed, mystified as well by Daniel's sudden withdrawal.

Once they were seated in the car, he explained while Sam drove towards the mountain.

"We can't say anything to Jack about this visit. He'll only think we were spying on him,"

"But Sandy would probably tell him when she next sees him and then he would get angry because he would believe we went nosing behind his back, wouldn't he?" Sam questioned. "In fact, I'm absolutely sure he would think we were spying on him."

"I agree with Major Carter!" Teal'c rumbled from the back seat. "O'Neill would be most displeased."

"Okay, yes, he'll probably create a fuss. I don't know about you guys, but I have an idea how we can smooth over this and help those kids at the same time."

"How?"

"You'll see," Daniel replied with a big smile. "I'll explain it later. I want to see how Jack's doing first."

OoOoOoOoO

Jack swam to the surface, his hearing muffled at first and filled with various beeps from the machines around him. He felt as if he'd been bulldozed by a truck. His side ached with a vengeance.

Slowly other sounds mingled in, hushed voices and then fading footsteps he clarified when his thoughts had cleared a little bit more.

"Colonel?"

He recognised Janet's voice, though opening his eyes was too hard to contemplate right now. He opened his mouth but if he said anything out loud he wasn't sure, even he couldn't be certain if he had spoken.

"Doc!" came the faint reply.

"Colonel, can you open your eyes for me?"

He swallowed hard, his mouth dry from the anaesthetic, but he focused on trying to prise open his eyelids.

Janet was watching him closely. She watched as his eyelids fluttered and opened slowly, stopping at half-mast, but at least he was awake, sort of. Then she had him squinting painfully and complaining, squirming to move away from her when she flashed the pen-light into his sensitive eyes.

He was definitely awake now.

"Ow!" he complained bitterly, blinking away the bright spots in his vision.

"Just doing my job Colonel," Janet groused.

"Oh! Guess I deserved that huh?" he croaked looking sheepishly up at her.

Janet straightened up, her hands resting on her hips, her face scowling.

Ooops! Jack sighed inwardly.

"I'm sorry Doc!" he sighed.

"Not as sorry as everyone else had been if you had died Colonel!" she retorted angrily. "What the hell were you thinking of? I told you..."

Jack bit his bottom lip and closed his eyes and blocked out Janet's angry lecture. It didn't matter now. He'd done what he'd set out to do, and as far as he was concerned those kids deserved anything he could do for them. His life meant nothing to him now. Sam obviously wasn't bothered if he was around anymore. She hadn't looked too pleased to see him when he'd arrived on her doorstep feeling worse for wear. Daniel just thought he was a joke. They were supposed to be his friends but even they had seemed to spurn his efforts to be friendly lately.

"...Why _did_ you leave the infirmary Colonel?" Janet demanded, waiting for his answer.

He remained closed off, but something pulled him back and he opened his eyes again, wondering what she was waiting for.

"Sorry? What?"

"Colonel, have you listened to a word I've said?" she asked peeved that he'd obviously ignored her.

"Uh, sorry Doc. I'm sick here; not really with it yet!" he said with a small grin, hoping that she would excuse him and remember her oath of helping the sick.

"Oooh!" Janet cried in frustration. "I asked you why you left my infirmary! And it had preferably be a better excuse than having a date with a woman that couldn't wait!" she ranted, thinking of how upset Sam had been when she found out.

"What?" he gasped wondering if he'd woken in one of those other reality universes.

"Daniel said you had a date with a woman, that's why you took off."

Jack was stunned. How? What the hell? Where did he get that idea from?

"Doc, I have no idea what you're talking about!" he denied her statement, raising a heavy hand to pinch his nose. He was confused and with a muzzy headache beginning, he wasn't sure about anything.

"Then why…?" Janet wasn't too sure if he was covering or just plain lying. Though he had never lied to her before, just never told her everything concerning the truth. He did look bemused by it though.

"I promised 'someone', a good friend, that I'd do something for them. A favour..." he broke off as Janet looked worried as well as shocked by his admission. "...not that kind of favour Doc! I'm serious. It was for the kids."

"Kids?" Janet was getting more and more confused.

Jack sighed. He supposed he should explain things.

"I promised someone, the sister of an old friend, that I would act as Santa to the kids in the orphanage today. I couldn't let them down Doc! They were really looking forward to it."

Janet's shoulders slumped, and all the anger fled from her when his words hit home.

"Why didn't you tell me. I could have gotten someone to stand in for you. Daniel would have done it," she gently reprimanded him.

"No he wouldn't!" Jack snapped, taking Janet by surprise by his quick denial.

"He would!"

"Would not! He thought it was a stupid idea!" he explained feeling lost again.

"I'm sure he didn't mean it like that Colonel."

Jack just gave her a cold look that made her think he was deadly serious. Had Daniel really thought that? She wondered. She couldn't believe that he would, but it was clear that he had upset Jack with his comments.

"Anyway Colonel. That does not excuse you from going AWOL when I specifically told you that you were not to get out of bed, and I am not pleased that once again I had to drop everything to save your butt. You were bleeding internally again, and if you hadn't got to Sam's house when you did, then you'd have probably bled to death. You gave her a real fright."

How could he have frightened Sam like that when she didn't care for him any more? He wondered, but his eyes were getting heavy again and he drifted off thinking about how much it hurt to lose the respect and affection of the one he loved.

OoOoOoOoO

He next woke to find Teal'c sitting beside his bed. The Jaffa was reading aloud to him though he hadn't made out the words until he focused on them to discover that Teal'c was reading to him from Charles Dickens' 'A Christmas Carol'.

He let the words wash over him for a moment before Teal'c stopped reading and stood up.

"O'Neill!" he said, looking down at his Commander and friend with a hint of a smile gracing his thick lips.

"Teal'c. Hi!" Jack croaked.

"Do you require anything at this time O'Neill?"

Jack nodded. He felt better than he had done, but he was still sleepy and sore.

"Water!" he said, licking his dry lips.

Teal'c raised his head and shoulders helping him to sip the cool liquid in the glass from the bedside table.

He was far more tender in his ministrations to what Jack had expected and he lay back wearily, wondering how such a huge warrior could be so gentle.

Teal'c pressed the call button and Janet came into the room a moment later.

"Colonel. Glad you could join us," she smiled, and Jack wondered why she was looking so pleased. Maybe it was the thought of prodding him with her big needles to get some sort of revenge on him for going AWOL.

Daniel and Sam followed her, then in came the General too. He greeted them all with a frown, wondering what they were all waiting for.

"Um...Jack...we...we're glad you're doing okay now, and we're sorry that...well, I'm sorry that I laughed at you about being Santa for those kids. And for giving everyone the wrong impression. It's just that...em... I'm really sorry for being an idiot Jack and I hope you can forgive me," Daniel waffled embarrassed.

Jack just lay there quietly, realising that Janet must have told them so he gave them a small shrug.

"It's no big deal Daniel. There's nothing to forgive."

"It is Jack. I was wrong about you and I should have known you better than that."

Daniel wrapped his arms around his middle again Jack sighed. He really didn't want to deal with all this right now. He was tired. He wanted nothing more than to just shut everything out and not think about how much it all hurt.

"Why didn't you say something Jack?" General Hammond asked gently.

"About what?" Jack responded trying for innocence.

"Jack!" he warned mildly. "You know what I'm talking about," the General added.

Jack sighed again, closing his eyes briefly.

"Because!" he said simply.

He opened his eyes and saw them waiting expectantly for his explanation.

"I told you, I couldn't let them down," he explained.

"But if you had asked me Jack, I would have gone in your place!" Daniel pleaded belatedly.

Jack gave him a look that showed how shocked he was that Daniel had actually wanted to play Santa.

"You would? After your reactions earlier? I didn't think for one minute that you would. You were so derisive about it."

"I'm sorry Jack. I had no right to put you down like that."

Jack sighed, pushing his head back into the soft pillows beneath him. Janet took his pulse again to make sure he was okay. He was still warm to her touch, but he had improved since she had rushed him into surgery on Christmas Day.

"I'll still have to make a note in your records Colonel," Hammond apologised.

"Yes sir. The proverbial straw sir?" he asked tentatively.

Hammond grinned.

"I don't think so son, but it was a close run thing this time."

Jack sighed with relief.

"Thank you General. I do appreciate your continued forbearance sir. I never meant any harm by slipping out for a couple of hours. I'm sorry I ignored Doc's advice. It won't happen again sir."

"Damn right it wont Jack!" Hammond snorted with a grin to ease his words. "Well, I'll leave you to talk Jack. I know your team is anxious to tell you everything."

Hammond turned and walked from the room, leaving Jack with a puzzled frown directed at his team-mates.

"So what's up kids?" he asked brightly, though he was still worried why Sam hadn't wanted to see him before all this happened. She looked a little shy and wouldn't meet his eyes whenever he'd looked at her.

Daniel stepped forward and took out a piece of paper from his wallet.

"It's about this Jack. We...er...met Sandy, and she told us what you had done. So we had a little whip round and...well, you can give her this when you get to see her," Daniel handed him the slip of paper which turned out to be a cheque for $500. Jack dropped his suddenly heavy hand, still clutching the cheque. He couldn't believe they had done this.

"Everyone contributed O'Neill. I did not 'twist' their arms as Daniel Jackson had accused me," Teal'c said seriously, though he did give a ghost of a smile that had Jack wondering how he had managed to get everyone to dip into their pockets.

"I don't know what to say," Jack said, lost for words. "I know Sandy will appreciate this a great deal.

"Maybe we can do the same for her every Christmas. Make it the SGC's personal charity thing," Sam suggested, making this the first time she had joined in since they had all entered the room.

"Why not?" Daniel asked enthusiastically. "We could collect things all year round and then make it a gift for Christmas.

"Okay. Good idea Major," Jack agreed, "And next time Daniel, you can play Santa on Christmas Day."

He looked stunned, but after Jack smirked he agreed readily.

"Anything you say Jack!"

"Great. So now I want a word with Carter! Do you mind?" he gestured to the door and Daniel and Teal'c left them to it.

As soon as the door shut there was a heavy atmosphere that hung in the room. After a few minutes they both started to speak at the same time.

"Carter..."

"Sir..."

Another pause before Jack spoke up, breaking through the uncomfortable silence.

"Have I said anything to upset you lately?"

Sam looked up from studying the floor, surprised by his words.

"Ah, no sir."

So formal? He wondered. He must have done something to earn this attitude from her.

"Have I done anything to offend you?"

"No sir. I thought..."

"What? Tell me?" he encouraged earnestly.

"I...em...I thought...Daniel said something and I was just..." she broke off not really knowing how to express her thoughts and feelings; the pangs of jealousy and anger.

"You thought that I had someone else? Because Daniel got so mixed up? You believed him?" he couldn't believe that she would think so little of him.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know what to think. You weren't exactly helping things. You just said to me that you 'didn't want to disappoint her'. What was I supposed to think? You wouldn't tell me what was wrong when I asked before!" she snapped out feeling helpless against the hurt still clinging ruthlessly to her heart strings.

Jack groaned with frustration.

"I don't remember saying that. What...'hurt'...was the fact that you wouldn't come and see me before you took off for Christmas, and I had no idea why not!"

His statement was greeted with silence, making him think he had lost her for good.

"Sam…I thought I had lost your trust, your faith in me. I didn't think you wanted anything more to do with me!"

Sam sniffed back a tear, still refusing to look at him while she tried to organise her chaotic feelings.

"I do love you Sam," he whispered. "There's no-one else that I want," he added softly, so they weren't overheard.

"Jack!" she whispered, grabbing hold of his hand and squeezing it. She glanced round and risked a quick kiss to his forehead and gave him a stunning smile. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to believe it, but when everything pointed to someone else, I couldn't help myself."

The door opened again and Sam quickly withdrew her hand from his.

"Okay! Santa Claus is here to give Jack his presents."

Daniel stood in the doorway with Jack's freshly cleaned Santa suit on and a bag full of presents.

"Seeing as you've been a good boy Jack but missed out on Christmas with us; we thought you could do with some good cheer! Merry Christmas! Yo Ho Ho!" he cried, making Jack and Sam laugh.

Daniel then emptied the bag onto Jack's lap and because he was too damn tired to sit up, he made them open the gifts for him, loving the moments when his team had gathered round him. This was what it was all about. The joy of giving, whether it was actual presents or just love, it didn't matter. He had plenty of that to go round, but most of his love was for Sam. He would give her everything within his power. His happiness came from having a great team who 'loved' him right back, each in their own way. He wouldn't change this for the world. He was just glad he was still alive to appreciate it.

The End.


End file.
